June marks the month of LGBT Pride. Wikipedia describes Pride best as: “Gay pride or LGBT pride is the promotion of the self-affirmation, dignity, equality, and increased visibility of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) people as a social group. Pride, as opposed to shame and social stigma, is the predominant outlook that bolsters most LGBT rights movements.”

I thought during the month of June I’d try to post more regularly and post exemplars of those who dedicated their lives to the message of the abiding, unending love of God, of the Divine, of Spirit for all people, especially those marginalized by most mainstream religions and who constantly reminded LGBT folks that they were just as worthy of God’s sacraments and Love as everyone else.

In my journey, I cannot begin this without acknowledging the most important figure in my journey as a gay man living out a life of faith and spirituality who was most influential in helping me love, affirm and accept myself with dignity and pride.  That person being the person of Jesus.

Pictured above is the interior of the St. Francis Chapel located in the heart of Boston within Boston’s Prudential Center.  It was just over 25 years ago as a young adult living in the city on my own and away from family and far away from where I grew up, that I discovered the St. Francis Chapel and spent many an afternoon or evening kneeling before the Blessed Sacrament praying to be “normal”.  I sent many thoughts and prayers up to be healed, to be changed, to be like others.  I prayed that no one would know my secret, that no one would ever know I was attracted to other guys.  I prayed for God to change me because I hated myself for having these secret feelings and affections that no one knew about.

It was in this very chapel, kneeling before the blessed sacrament one Sunday afternoon in November, on the left end of the second row of pews on the left, that I was praying to be changed that Jesus spoke to me.  My experience of Christ’s epiphany wasn’t as dramatic as St. Francis’ famous experience of Christ speaking to him as he knelt before the crucifix at San Damiano, but it was just as life changing and transforming.

On that afternoon, I prayed before the Blessed Sacrament and said, “I guess that makes me gay.  I hate myself for being gay.  Please change me.”   

Deep within my heart, Christ spoke and said, “I love you.”  

“I don’t want to be gay.  I want to be normal.”  

“I love you.”

“I just want to be like everyone else.”

“I love you.  Can’t you see?  Don’t you know?  Nothing can ever take my love away from you.  No one can ever deny I love you or deny my love for anyone.  I love you.”

So on that November afternoon.  In the peace and quiet of the St. Francis Chapel in Boston’s Prudential Center, for the first time in my 29 years of living, I could finally love and accept and be proud of who I was as I was created by God.  I didn’t choose to be gay that day.  I didn’t choose to struggle with these attractions and affections leading up to that day.  At that moment, as Christ spoke to me from the Blessed Sacrament on the altar below that St. Damiano Crucifix hanging in the chapel, I chose to accept and love myself from that day on and to be an ambassador helping any and all people — gay, straight, in recovery from addiction, divorced, victim’s of abuse — who struggle with loving themselves to know that God loves you, Christ loves you, love yourself.  Love is eternal.  God’s love is eternal and abiding and no one or no thing can separate you from the love of God when you love and accept yourself as you were created.

So remember as this Pride Month begins, there are many LGBT heroes, mentors and advocates who are deserving of helping spread that awareness of love and acceptance and equality, but the greatest, most historic of them all is God, is the Creator, is Divine Source who loved the world so much and one day thought the world was missing something very important and from that thought in God’s mind you, your soul, was created.

“And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.  God is love.  Whoever lives in love, lives in God, and God in them.”  I John 4:16